Making lemonade

You know the old saying...."when life gives you lemons, make lemonade" ...I want to know where it says then add ice, vodka and shake like hell.

Life moves and changes so fast. Mostly it's completely out of our control. Just for one day, however, I'd like to have a little control. I'd like to have a button for pause, rewind or even erase. It seems the older I get, the harder it gets to get through a day unscathed by so much. Tornado's are raving our countryside, people are getting sick and dying everyday, relationships start and end in the blink of an eye and somehow the days keep on keeping on but with a few new additions. We take vacations to get away from our lives and to recharge and restore our soul. It's kind of a band aide for life but it helps get us through the tougher times.

I recently lost my dad, he was 71 years old. I didn't have the best relationship with him and even though over the years we tried to make amends, it never really happened. I waited too long...or he was too stubborn....whatever the case, it will always remain an unresolved issue within me. I can't change how it ended, I can't really change what was....all I can do is deal with what is now and try to move forward with that.

These moments that come unexpectedly can change our lives forever. They can alter our thinking and perspective on what is really important. We start to value our own time and lives a little bit more. Is it worth fighting over some of the little things in life or do we save that anger and frustration for the bigger moments? What is worth us getting upset over?

Now my mom is in the hospital. She is also 71. She has COPD - a degenerative lung disease that will eventually kill her. It's hard to watch her struggle so much day to day just to breath. Its a little hard to stop our lives and take time out to go sit with her at the hospital...no one likes to be in a hospital much less go to visit anyone there but it's so hard because there is absolutely nothing we can do. All we can do is wait and hope the medicine clears up the fluid in her lungs that doesn't allow her to breath well and wait...eventually there won't be a time the medicine will work...it's kind of surreal to know that and every time we wonder...is it now?

The reality is we all die. We are born knowing this and yes it's sad and yes it's hard but it's the circle of life. It's how we deal with it and allow our connections to those in our lives to treat us that really matters. We can choose that right now while they are still with us. We can choose to make things end differently for ourselves....that's what we have control over.

So yes, life continues to throw us lemons and we can squeeze as hard and fast as we can but there's always going to be lemonade...do we drink it or not?

Putting things in there place

I need a place to put things…inside my brain. My work me has a place, the fun me has a place, the crazy irrational me even has a place. When so much comes at a person so fast and its new stuff that doesn’t have a place…..I need a place. It’s hard to know where to put all those new voices that creep into our heads.

Everyone has them, those little voices that sound a lot like you. They sit in your head and talks away trying to get you to listen. The boring pop-psych word for them is Internal Monologue.

For a lot of people, the internal monologue is nothing but negative self-talk. You know, “I’m awful. I’m worthless. I’m ugly. I suck at this. I’m a fraud. No one will ever love me.” The problem is that this internal monologue has an annoying habit of affecting your external life and there really isn’t a place for it.

It’s these things that stop us in our tracks and keep us in our place not allowing us to venture out and try any new path or things. They are afraid of trying anything new because they have this voice in the back of their head telling them they’re not worthy of awesomeness. I’m telling you right now, you are totally awesome. You can do awesome things. And you have the right to stop listening to negative self-talk.

You have the right, honor, and duty to tell that voice to SHUT UP! It’s hard, I know because I’ve been there. Heck sometimes live there. If truth be told, I think I own a time-share in there. I still find my inner monologue taking a field trip back to Worthlessville from time to time.

When I realize that’s what’s happening, I imagine that little negative voice as a very small figurine. I mentally pick that very small figurine up by the scruff of the neck between my index finger and thumb, and I throw it through the mental wood chipper.

Because no one is going to stop me from being awesome.

Not even myself.