Find your why

Why are we here? Why do we exist? What makes us get up each day and do what it is we do without even thinking about it? How do we really become who we are?

You can do what you think you cannot do but it all come from our own thinking. Our own limitations hold us back, our own assumptions and fears hold us back from achieving what we really want to do. What our purpose is is dependant on our own perspectives. What is our authentic purpose? It lies within us. It seems like the paths I trudge down are blocked all the time and half way through I have to stop and turn around and try another path. It's not really a bad way to travel but it's important to find your why to continue on your path. This time of the year is all about change....you can visually see it happening before your eyes. Nothing you can do to stop it so it's best to just embrace it....embrace the change.

I love this weather. I love the cool days, the howling winds, the crisp air......it signifies a change is happening. That would be nice if our lives had that obvious of a notifier.

Change is constant...every time you turn around things are changing. It's weird because sometimes it feels like nothing is ever going to change and you blink and suddenly everything is different. It seems when my life is happening and I'm enjoying the ride - suddenly things change. It's out of my control and I don't get a say in keeping things as they are, as I like them as I want them to stay because the changes isn't really in my control. It's frustrating on one level and on another level it's kind of refreshing to have things change and move in a new direction. It forces me to change my thinking and to continue to move. Although sometimes I think it would be kind of nice to just ride the ride for a little while.

I feel like there is so much I want to do during this fall like weather....so many places I want to go, want to see but I feel like I'm limited. Limited because the people I want to do these things with have other things to do or people to spend their time with. I need my own people....people who want to spend their days and time with me.....it's hard. My nieces and nephews are all at the point in their lives where they are having their own lives...they have their own things to do and my friends mostly have their own lives to live and their own people to spend their time with and then there is me. Seems like I am the only one not moving onto anything new. I feel stuck...like I'm spinning my wheels in place and not really going anywhere.

I never used to be this way, I never felt like I needed anyone to do things with or to spend my time with but as I get older I'm finding that I just don't like spending my days alone any more yet I can't seem to find the person or people to spend their time with me. It's challenging. People don't need me...I used to feel like I was needed.....that I served a purpose but lately it feels like no one needs me. Not like they don't want me around but they have their own lives in place and their own goals to work towards. It's an odd feeling to be this old and feel like you don't have a purpose.....my why.

Just as the seasons change, we all have to change. We have to explore new roads, go down new paths and watch our own colors change. It's all in how we approach it, do we stay a one season person or do we embrace the changes in the wind and go where the wind takes us? Our choice I guess.....it always comes down to our own choices.

Why does it have to be so challenging to know who we are? Why do we always question ourselves? It seems that we work so hard to figure out who we are and what we want and I wonder, do we ever get it?

Do we ever figure out our why?