Perfection is a myth

Can a person really have it all? Can we have the right job, the perfect mate, and the best kids, the most fantastically (is that a word?) perfect job while still waking up every day absolutely happy?

Of course we CAN’T have it all!
You tell me one person who has absolutely everything! Perfectionism is an illusion of the mind. I think we strive for it at such a rate that we end up driving ourselves into a frenzy which then causes us to seek therapy once we realize it’s virtually impossible to achieve.

What does it mean to have it all?
I look at people and think my life would be pretty darn amazing if I were in their shoes. People like Oprah are really not fair to compare ourselves to because not many people get to live life at that level. I am talking about people I see almost every day and I know small parts of their life and I have to wonder, do they really have it all? Do they really have the dream job, power, success, friends, family and love? From my point of view having these things give you a leg up on life and you get to be happy and content…but does anyone really have it all without wanting something else or something more?

I know people who seem to have it all from another person’s perspective. Many people have made the comment to me that I have the best life. No commitments, no kids, no partner – total freedom. There is something more satisfying that freedom however. There are times I am still disappointed with my own life choices.

Not one of my friends has it all. I'd like to think they do, and some days it seems like they do but the reality is...no one does. This is a fact I have to accept, it's hard for me to say that because I feel like if I am not striving towards or working to get to have it all, what's the point?

This is not to make you complacent or accepting of crap in your life– it’s just a fact. Everyone has something to deal with. Maybe it’s a loved one with a terrible illness, money issues, maybe an unhappy relationship/marriage, a terrible job - something. If you’re lucky enough to have the support of great friends and family, or a good therapist to help shoulder your pain, you’re even luckier.

I am not saying you cannot have a fulfilling life, with a career, kids, husband, and balance. There are no judgments regardless of the position you are in, and you may as well make the best of the hand you have been dealt. But our time on earth is quite short, and this is no dress rehearsal so we really need to come to terms with life as it is and find ways to move forward with zest and appeal.

In my opinion, I think having it all is just simply being happy. Being happy with who you are, what you are doing and who you are choosing to spend your life with. Truly content from within, regardless of how much money you have, of whether you work, stay at home, or opt out of motherhood altogether.

Perfection is an illusion and it’s OK that you don’t have it all, it does not make us flawed or a freak, it only makes us human.