Scared

I was talking with a friend last night and we sort of giggled about it but I have this irrational fear, no fear isn't the right word, dislike....that's it...I have this irrational dislike for being alone. I don't like it. I've said it before and I'll say it again, I do not like living alone and I do not like being alone. There....I've said it.

Lately I've found that I will pretty much do anything to avoid being alone at home...anything. That may be good but it's also kinda bad. What's driving this? Why all of a sudden since I moved into my better, bigger, nicer, big girl apartment do these issues come to the surface for me? What's changed? What's bringing this all up? I guess only I can figure that out but it is interesting to me and it's a fairly new thing.

My note from the Universe today kinda made the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. Kinda freaky how these messages often tie into my morning thoughts:

You know what makes the darkest of times bearable?
Remembering that it's all illusions, in a dreamed-up world, where angels earn their wings, thoughts dress up as things, and that "somewhere back home," you lie safely in bed, in the palm of my hand, snuggled up tight with some big, fluffy stuffed animal.
Nice wings,
The Universe

These messages always have a little tag line at the end too....today's said P.S.
I do love watching you sleep. Oddly enough that gave me comfort. I like the thought of someone there, watching over me keeping me safe...safe from what I'm not quite sure but safe none the less.

This week begins my flex Friday schedule, meaning I get every other Friday off through the summer. Last year I took off every Friday but due to other people's schedules, we need to keep a balance here I can't do that this year...which is OK really but I do plan to take a week in July and a few long weekends in June too...I'll use up my 6 weeks of vacation....don't worry about me...I'll be fine!

Only 5 weeks until my final paper is due.....I have it started but I really need to find some time to really start to work it. I present mine on June 16th which means I am officially done with school then but still will go to my last class on June 23rd to support my cohorts. Wow....5 weeks. I can't even imagine what I will do then.

Off to create miracles today.