Making a new list, checking it twice

A person knows there are just certain things they just won't do....I won't ever eat live squid or pretty much any live animal, absolutely not! Like I said, I know there are things I will never, ever do. As I get older, as I get more life experience and see how little anyone else cares about what I do I see there are maybe somethings I put on my "no" list that I would be willing to move. So perhaps it's time to create a NEW list...an improved list...a"maybe" list.

I love Cheryl Richardson (cherylrichardson.com) she is a life coach and sends out a weekly news letter with good tips, suggestions and of course offering her books and seminars. She also has these Touch of Grace cards and a site on her website where you can get divine help at the click of a mouse. Try it out.

Today's message happened to be about graduation....couldn't be more timely - at least for me. So I share with you her 7 lessons to make a positive difference as we look towards starting out the next and new phase of life after graduation. Enjoy!

1. Spend more time on the who rather than the what. What you do will always be less important than who you become. Knowledge is great but it will never take you as far as your courage, your integrity, your reputation for someone who keeps his or her word, or your commitment to be of service to others in an important way. As you go through life, you will face challenges and obstacles. When you do, get in the habit of asking yourself the following three questions: 1. How can I grow from this experience? 2. What qualities of character am I being called to develop? 3. How can I use this event to make me a better person?

I like this rule for the obvious reasons. I've said it before though...your reputation is all you have and if you let someone else control that or change that then what have you got? Nothing.

2. Follow your heart. Pay far more attention to what you think than what everyone else thinks. The most important relationship you'll ever have is with you. When I think about the regrets I've heard from adults over the years, the biggest ones always have to do with listening to everyone else but themselves. Start now. Make your own rules and follow them. At the end of your life, the most important person you'll have to answer to is you.

This one is hard for me....I feel like I don't know what my heart is saying. If I trust it or try to hear it, I am not sure I am hearing MY heart. What I want, what I think. I have to learn to hear my own voice...that may be harder that learning to follow your heart.

3. Develop a strong "maverick muscle." Be willing to bend the rules, learn how to disappoint others gracefully, get comfortable with people not liking you, and always strive to be an original thinker. Allow yourself to be the unique spirit that you were meant to be. Trust me. Your willingness to rock the boat will set you apart from 95% of the people you meet throughout your life.

I love this thought! Love that there is a name for our own uniqueness. I am drawn to people who are different, who go against the grain, who push the envelope. I always want to be that person. By giving it a name, it sort of makes it real, like I have proof now that I can be who I am. I am a maverick!

4. Build your courage muscles. Starting tomorrow, practice doing one small thing a day that frightens you. Learn to water ski, ask someone out on a date, go for that promotion you keep dreaming about, or learn to dance. Small acts of courage strengthen your ability to take even bigger leaps later on like deciding to write your own book or run for political office. Courage builds confidence and confident people rarely settle for less.

This also is a good one. I always say if I just don't think about things I can do them. If I just move ahead without thinking I can do anything....that alone is scary.


5. Don't go to the hardware store for milk. When you're excited about doing something new, make sure you turn to those people who will encourage you to take a chance - the ones who believe in you rather than those who will tell you why an idea won't work. Surround yourself with positive people - the kind of people who challenge you to reach beyond your fear rather than play it safe. There will always be people telling you why an idea is risky, or why you can't do something. That advice is usually based on the mistakes they've made or the chances they didn't take because they were afraid. Always remember this: Someone's past does not equal your future. When faced with a naysayer, smile, say thank you, and turn around. Stick with positive people who believe in you. Remember, if you needed milk, you wouldn't go to the hardware store.

By the way, you're mom was right. You do become who you hang around with. Choose your friends wisely.

I hate it that my mom was right about anything but I have to give her this one. You do become who your friends are. That's why this last year I've ventured out onto a new path, seeking out those who push me on new paths, challenge me to go do things I've never done and most importantly, to have fun with. I think we all need more fun in our lives.

6. Live by this mantra: Where there's a will, there's a way. Don't give up, especially when things get hard, and don't ever let anyone or anything put limits on you.

I've always believed in this one. I like to say there is the right way and there is my way. Usually my way is more fun! I want to start living my life in a new way. I want to be that brave, smart, funny person I pretend to be.....but really be that person. I always give up too soon.

7. Stay connected. Your use of technology - email or texting, for example - will never replace the value of a live connection with someone. Every now and then pick up the phone and call a friend or visit a loved one rather than send an email or text message. When we come to the end of our lives, it's who we loved and who loved us that matters most.

See...texting is keeping me connected!! I do have to admit, technology is something I've really had to work hard at embracing because my instant instinct is "if it ain't broke, don't fix it". So I have to push myself out on the edge and learn and do new things and I have to admit, it's been fun!

Finally, at the time you were born you were given an amazing gift - a gift that most of us forget about as we grow older. It's the power to design your own unique life. You are an artist. The canvas is your life. From this moment on, take ownership of this gift and use it wisely. If you do, your life will become an extraordinary work of art.

"There will come a time when you believe everything is finished.
That will be the beginning."
--Louis L'Amour