Friday, April 3, 2009

Funny things....

You know I always say the Universe is a funny thing...but suddenly it really seems to be IN my head.

I don't know if it's because my birthday is approaching and even though I work hard to have fun with it, something deep inside me always cringes as it approached. Or if a full moon is on the cusp, if I'm just so overwhelmed with life and work right now that I feel I need a "under construction" sign posted ON me.....don't know but the Universe seems to really be hearing me and responding...just not sure what to do with what it's saying.

I feel discombobulated, like I just can't get a clear grip on things going on around me. Then this from the Universe today:
These are the times when hopes are dashed and chaos abounds,that golden opportunities, prized ideas, and new friends emerge into the view of all, but are only seen by the few who look.

Let's go crazy,
The Universe


This is for sure one of those times. Smart ass Universe. What lesson am I suppose to be learning from this?

I had to be in several meetings yesterday, not what I normally have to do, and at one point I found myself just staring at the group wondering how many of them were married and what their spouse was like.

What connects two people? Are they opposites that balance each other? Are they happy? Did they choose to be together or was it one of those things like OMG I don't want to be alone the rest of my life - you'll do? What connects two souls?

What is it that makes two people decide to spend their lives together? Through the good and the bad, the ups and the downs? What drives them to commit themselves to another person and do some of us not have that in us? I wondered if you asked them "what is your favorite thing about your partner?" what kind of an answer you would get.

I wonder that about myself too. If feels like the last few weeks I've been getting feedback about all the things I need to change...to fix, to adjust....why I'm not the "best me" I could be and how I need to change to fit into someone's idealistic mold of what they think I should be. I normally can ignore it and move on but for some reason, it's really stuck with me and its really beginning to wear my soul down.

I guess I need to make a list of my favorite things about myself...or is it that I'm just not looking? Hmm, so much to ponder on a Friday morning.

1 comment:

Schnoodler said...

you're perfect just the way you are.