Connections

People are starving for connections. We want to connect with others so bad that sometimes we don't really think about it we just plunge full throttle until we crash into them. I was reminded of this fact this weekend while I was at my admin meeting. Had a great time as I usually do and I really learned a lot from the seminar speakers. There was one speaker on developing better communications and she referenced how people are starved for connections. How that physical connection between people is needed for people to feel complete, connected and whole. She referenced the movie CRASH which was basically about people who have become so passive in their own lives that they were physically "crashing" into each other to feel something. It made me think how often we meander through life just going through the motions of day to day life and something big has to hit us on the head to make us snap out of it and realize what is happening. One of my favorite quotes is "Don't go through life so fast that someone has to throw a brick to get your attention." We all do it, we get through each day with a list or a purpose to get things done and we are so focused on the end result that we tend to overlook the journey along the way. One of the nice things about these conferences is I get to spend time with other admins but I also get to see people whom I really like and admire but don't get to see very often. I always leave feeling revitalized and recharged to take on my life again.

97% of our communication is non-verbal. I scoffed at this fact but then today, I started looking at people during meetings and conversations and boy....their non-verbals really tell a different story. I wonder if that is a learned behavior of if we just have to find something about a situation to divert our attention that we scowl, cross our arms, roll our eyes or just plain disengage. Are we taught this? As a child we look to our parents to tell us who we are. Look mommy I put my toys away...aren't I a good girl? But as we get older we have to figure that out for ourselves. We no longer want our parents to "define" us. We want to choose who we think we are or who we become. What part of yourself is real and what part have we let others create for us? It's like a butterfly coming to life. I see this in my nieces behavior toward the adults in their lives. They need/want less and less input from us and they are spreading their wings and growing. Thank God I am not a parent, I don't think I could stand by and watch that happen. It kills me now when I feel it from my nieces and nephews....I don't know that I could stand that as a parent.

What parts of ourselves can we change. Who among us has has the "perfect" childhood? What is real? I've always said you can out grow your parents....it isn't easy but it can be done. It's hard to look at ourselves and try to figure out what you can change...what parts are the real me and what parts are a muddle of what I let others define as me? Who am I really? Ahh if I had these answers I'd be rich - rich I tell you. But hearing these messages again help me feel more stable on my path. It may not be my final path or my last path but at least I feel like after a fun weekend of singing, dancing and learning, I am ready to stand steady and begin walking the path again. Connections...how easy they make our journey.